How are you doing with acceptance of your pain and limitations?
I came across a study which evaluated how well people have accepted their chronic illness. The study designed a questionnaire to test how well people have adapted to their chronic conditions and accepted changes in their lives.
The authors define acceptance as giving up fruitless efforts to control all pain and redirecting one’s energy to living a positive life, even with pain and limitations. Acceptance is not resignation or surrender.
Here are the items on their scale (slightly changed, in particular to relate to pain):
1. I’ve come to terms with my pain.
2. I’d give all my money to get rid of pain.
3. I think of pain as a curse.
4. I can’t conquer pain, but I can adapt to it.
5. My fondest dream is that I’ll awaken without my pain.
6. Having a disease like pain is just a part of life.
7. Pain is a focal point in my life.
8. I spend a lot of time wondering why I have pain.
9. I think of pain as just part of who I am.
10. I think a lot about what my life would be like without pain.
The actual scoring of their scale is complicated, but people who have most fully accepted their condition answer ‘agree’ to items 1, 4, 6, and 9, and ‘disagree’ to items 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 10.
Acceptance does free up energy to get on with living, though doing that is a big challenge. It’s also a process, rather than a 1-time decision. Health challenges can even bring opportunities for growth and positive change.
What are your thoughts about acceptance?
The original article is: Conceptualization and Development of the Acceptance
of Chronic Health Conditions Scale, by Alexa Stuifbergen et. al., in Issues in Mental Health Nursing, 2008, Volume 29, pages 101–114.
The deadline for your May Pain-Blog Carnival submission is 5/23.
7 responses so far ↓
dweedle29 // May 23, 2008 at 7:48 am
I did the test , I do not accept my chronic nerve pain. Ive had this pain for a year now with no end in sight. it consumes my whole being consant 24/7. I will not accept this pain in my life. How can you accept this kind of pain at a age where your own life is just begining??? How can I deal with this pain that has stoped me in my tracks and I can not do anything I use to do?
How to Cope with Pain // May 23, 2008 at 9:45 am
You’re right that chronic pain is a gigantic challenge. And it’s important to work to try to decrease your pain. However, if it continues, then re-focusing your energy on living despite pain is a crucial step to make. Of course, that’s easier said than done. But I’d encourage you to consider starting that process.
Many of the posts on this website discuss decreasing pain, but also living as fully as possible despite pain. Good luck!
Maggie // Jun 22, 2009 at 10:08 am
I agree with dweedle29, I refuse to accept this pain. I’ve been dealing with it since 1990. It’s a constant battle to try and stay even. There are so many things I want to do, but when I’m hurting I just want to go to sleep to escape the pain. I can’t imagine accepting pain as a part of life…..Life is suppose to be pain-free. I feel I’ve wasted so much of my life just dealing with RSD. I don’t even know where to begin with acceptance……
Sue // Nov 8, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Oh my goodness, such rage in those comments. I wish we could wave a magic wand and make pain disappear, but I am pretty sure that ain’t gonna happen. But I do think if each of us waved a magic wand and said, right now this minute things aren’t horrible, and that in itself is good. I pray for days of less pain, I wish for joy and fun and laughter and try to find it in every little thing. A day with less pain is a joy, watching a squirrel scampering by is fun. Finishing a crossword puzzle makes me smile. And that very old but true adage, Fake it till you make it, most of the time, unless I am in agony, if I pretend it doesnt hurt that much, guess what? It doesnt hurt THAT much. I realize I will never again be without pain, so I go with degrees, Bad, very bad and freakin god damn, how can I still be alive and hurt this much. Anyday that I am not in true real agony is not that bad of a day.
Margie // Nov 17, 2009 at 6:35 pm
I didnt hear the rage in their posts – I only heard frustration, sadness and a lot of emotional pain from having chronic pain. I can certainly relate to times where I have felt the same and rage is an emotion that I do not have the strength to have and I am blessed with a half glass full attitude which includes enjoying the little things in life and even though I accept that pain is part of my life, the irrationality of crps/rsd and the progressiveness of it leaves me gasping sometimes as my acceptance then has to incorporate another added part of this syndrome i.e. going from just one arm to both arms to back, one leg, both legs, now crps pain in my insides with pain so extreme i pass out. so, I still do sometimes think it’s unfair….
toni // Dec 7, 2009 at 10:21 am
my pain and despair travel around my body, recently it has been my digestive tract ,(I also have arthritic neck and lower spine I wont list all the areas) it seems no one can tell me what is wrong with my gut, this has been particularly bad for the last two months and I havenot really been functioning for the past three years normally, I am told it is due to my anxiety and only I can help myself I feel cut off from everyone, I want to accept how I am … slowly any friends I had are not around , my family too, we live away from all but one member.. one of my daughters and she cannot cope with the situation so keeps away. I am 81 I have really tried so hard to do all I can to help myself, somedays are easier and I have momentsof peace, my husband says you know what to do , then gets on with things as they are, we have had a rough year with his health he is better now after an operation… I never thought it would be like this, I can only say that for most of my life I could manage my pain and anxiety
peadeej // Dec 7, 2009 at 3:56 pm
toni: how very much i feel every single word you have written. i am 49; i have been suffering with rsd for eleven years now. the last ten years have been turbulent as rsd has not only attacked my body, along the way it ruptured my spirit, heart and soul. i am here today to shout, accept, give in – whatever you want to call it “ACCEPTANCE” is really the only peace and leads you to travel a new life.
“Accept yourself as you are; As you have lost one person to regain another.” pea
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